So the whole reason why I made a blog in the first place was to have somewhere to vent. I am not a big fan of talking to other people about my problems (unless I do it sarcastically and we laugh about them), so I figured why not find a way that I can rant without having anyone actually listen? The internet fit the bill. It’s like shouting into an endless void. It’s perfect, I love it!
Anyways, usually I would talk about something or someone that’s been weighing me down or I would talk about one of my strong beliefs – anything that would make me feel a little bit lighter. Well, as of this moment, February 22nd at 8:20 PM, I have absolutely nothing weighing me down. In fact, I have a couple of things that are lifting me up, and that’s what I’m going to write about today instead!
For one, I think I have finally taken control over the devil that is procrastination (well, for now). I don’t know if it’s because I’m not in school this semester, meaning deadlines aren’t weighing me down, or if it’s because I actually have mastered the art of time management. Either way, I don’t feel guilty when I sit down and watch Netflix because I DON’T HAVE ANY UNFINISHED BUSINESS. It’s like an ongoing state of bliss.
If you read my last post, you know that I am living at home this semester because I am working full time. That means that while all my friends are away at college, I’m stuck here with basically nothing to do on the weekends. My brother always has plans and nobody really comes home from college. Since my school is only 50 minutes away from home, you bet your bottom dollar that I visit campus as much as possible. I’m actually visiting this weekend, which is why I’m in such a good mood! I won’t have any homework or tests nagging me in the back of my mind while I’m hanging out with friends, so I can actually enjoy myself this weekend.
That brings me to the biggest reason why I’m in such a good mood: I know that I have the best friends. I know it sounds cliché, but honestly, I feel like they put up with so much from me. I ask them for a lot, yet they always give me more than I need. For example, when I told them all that I was living at home for the semester, I mentioned how I wanted to visit them often. A good handful of them immediately offered their rooms for me to sleep in if I was over for the weekend. And I have definitely been taking them up on that.
But the most important reason why I love them all so much is because no matter how weird I act around them, no matter how many snorts I accidentally let slip, they always stick around. I talk to them every single day and whenever I go to campus for the weekend and see them in person, they are always excited to see me.
This is actually a pretty big thing for me because I have this notion that everyone secretly hates me. I know, it’s a very big assumption to make, but I can’t shake that feeling. However hard I try, there’s always going to be a part of me that tells me that my friends are getting annoyed from me and that I should back off. But luckily for me, I have friends that are constantly showing me that they actually care about me. It makes me feel tons better when I get a random “I miss you” text or when they send me an inside joke saying “this made me think of you.”
“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.” –Jim Morrison
I can definitely say that my friends let me be my weird self even though I’m probably the oddest friend they’ve ever had. They all make me feel good about myself; that’s how you know they’re keepers.
Well this definitely turned a little bit more emotional than I had planned, but that’s alright! One of my very first posts on blurtwords was actually about having awesome friends. Guess I love them a little too much. 🙂